At times it seems that the choices we make in life are so easy. You don't sleep on a heating pad, you always kiss your kid goodnight, you tell your husband that you love him at every possible opportunity, and you get up every morning, say "Hello!" to the Lord, and do your best to be his representative that day.
When big descisions come my way, I have always prayed, and the Lord has always clearly guided me. He never has, and I know He never will, let me float adrift without Him.
It seems as of late, however, that I am drifting.
I know that this is due to me, and not to Him. I also realize that I am not to be motivated by feelings.
I have also learned that I am a Martha, not a Mary. I need to learn to put down my "To Do" list, sit at His feet, and simply enjoy his company.
I am reading a book right now entitled, "How to have a Mary heart in a Martha World". In this book, the author retells a story that spoke volumes to me. Below, I paraphrase:
A man was walking along and he met the Lord. The Lord asked him, "Will you serve me?" The man, excited to have an opportunity to serve his Lord, agrees wholeheartedly. The Lord asks him to take a small bag of stones to the top of a nearby mountain. The man cheerfully accepts this light load, places it in his wagon, and begins his journey.
As he happily walks along, he comes upon a friend. So happy is he to be serving the Lord, he tells his friend of his task and his excitement. His friend responds by saying "Wow! That is great. Hey, since you are going there anyway, would you be willing to take this stone to the top of the mountain for me? It would really be a blessing to me." The friend agrees, loads his friend's stone, and resumes his journey. After encountering a few more "friends", he agrees to take even more rocks to the mountain, all with good intentions, or because he didn't want to say no. As he begins up the hill, the load is heavy, he begins to sweat, and the wagon wobbles with the too-heavy load. No longer praising the Lord for this opportunity to serve, he is now grumbling and mumbling about why the Lord gave his such a heavy burden to bear.
Suddenly the Lord appears. "Why are you angry with me? The load that I gave you was light and easy to bear. I did not ask more of you than you could handle, it was you who took on the additional load. " The man removed the burdens others had given him, and immediately realized the joy of bearing the lighter load the Lord required.
Lord, help me pare away those things in my life that keep me from You. Help me recognize the things that I have committed myself to do for that are in excess of what you have asked of me. Help me enjoy the process.